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Brian Rose, FFF founder, important business entrepreneur and controversial gentleman, has died at the age of the big 4-0.

It is with great sadness and woe that FFF Magazine 🙂 announces today, the death of our most glorious magnanimous CEO leader, Brian Dashel Allen Rose, son of D.A. Rose, assistant district attorney P.I.

Brian perished fully brutally and died Tuesday, December 4, 2018 at his home in Glastonbury, of a massive explosion and lust.

Rose rose to power in the early 2000s as an early investor and dedicated family guy.

In the last year he’s been in the limelight also famous uncontrollably uncomfortably facing his worst fears and nightmares as Char Ming, his beautiful pet well fed soft horse with a big ol horse butt, and honestly the horse love of his human being life, died in his arms on the outskirts of town earlier A not OK corral.

Rose grew up in Connecticut, the son of Assistant Attorney General D. A. Rose (born Dire Rose) and pilot mind bender Jessica Sodo Flewno.

Brian graduated from Harvard in 2006 at the top of his class, having studied investment law.

He became a billionaire at the age of  21 when he discovered a rare and quite flexible stone known as Lartz Miraz, used as the principal material in the construction of many of the bridges and tunnels used in our time today, ones you have been on at least once prolly.

Rose was the first CEO in the whole world to receive the medal of joy as part of the president Obama’s program “Endless Boundless Brigadiers “.

Rose’s last will is clear and it’s meaning cannot be misunderstood: “FFF Magazine is to become the most important magazine of all time and to cause such disruption in human history as to be so kick ass and fantastic, that no one won’t notice and that’s so important. My sons Blobby, Whip, and Erekt and my daughters Sloan, Mell, Gall, and Ghost will take over all my properties and killer business opportunities, of which FFF Magazine is my favorite and most profitable.”

We love you Brian, we love you so deeply it pains the FFF Magazine staff that you are now so very dead but also we take comfort in your words, wisdom, and hope you’re in a better far off place like heaven or hell forever enjoying glass and desserts with heated up frozen fruit, watching the tv shows you like and honestly Brian, like you often said “tada”!

You were a great little kid and child, a great teen, perfect 10, a great 20 something, a fantastic CEO and editor and owner, and a good dad and you loved Char Ming!!! It’s okay to go Brian cause honestly? We love you and always will!

XOXO <3
You son and best friend, Blobby Rose.

GUEST writers!! Everyone listen, we’ve got extra writers in the office FOR ONE NIGHT!

5 puddings, I thought it was one thing but it became another.

Ingredients:

One birthday, 3 friends around the hard table, rose water, cream of ice (one gallon), lots and lots of sugar (to taste).

It was a close call after we extinguished our dead red steaks, that we would even make it to Brian’s house for the after party. Jen only turns 35 once and that means for big celebrations. As tired as we were digesting our animals, we shlogged our booted feet throw the fluffy snow, me with socks, Jen with none. Half way there she pulled up the leg of her pants and showed me her bare ankle. She remarked “actually I didnt even pull up the leg of my pants, there are actually just short. Too short. But Im not cold….” . “Thank God, I said.”

Got to Brians and he closelined us with a beautiful twine sign which we read out loud ” Jay Eee Enn” !!!!! soon the pudding was everywhere and no one was asking questions. We sat down and Brian started to creep us out a little as he insisted we drop a little rose water in each bowl. We were suspicious and after adding couple scoops coffee ice cream and a teeny bit of decaf coffee fresh from the new exspresso machine, we wanted to stop adding to the pudding. It looked fine thanks. We tested it with tongues as innocent as the morning dew and hell did it ever come through!! But in the end, we were guests of Barron Brian Rose and so took a drop of rose water and stirred it deep into the pudding. What started out tasty, quickly became world famous not only in our minds but in our mouths, our hearts and human kind.

Byline: KARA KEITH

 

Frederick & Brian = Weezer/Shellac Review

Frederick Burton

I just saw weezer. It wasn’t all that exciting a live performance. Their back drop was just the blue album cover for the entire set
 they opened with back to the shack though
 Brendan Reed
but get pumped!
Frederick Burton
I found Weezer very disappointing, and the new stuff is super drab

 Brendan Reed
too dark for daytime
Frederick Burton
you should post that as your review in fff magazine

FINALLY stevie nicks

comes out of HIDING
SUONI PER IL POPOLO 2014 Headliner:

Hauntingly familiar INDEED. I already have my tickets!! I bought extra!! Who wants some tho? Send me 100$ USD and I will take your money and give you NOTHING in return but just google some shit and you will feel just as good and I will SPEND all your money for you, something you have trouble doing, cause you are AFRAID TO FUCKFACE!

OOOO baby
OOOO baby
OOOOOO

DRUG TESTING ENFORCED

There will now be, upon decree and mandatory statute, DRUG TESTING @ FFF offices to ensure that less and less of the kinds of people we don’t want don’t walk thru our doors. It’s time to shut down the use of such substances in the office and we need to clean up the scene around here SO THAT we have less of this stuff flowing thru the septic and less powders on the table stool.

We are trying to write a MAGAZINE! WE ARE OLD NEWSPAPER MEN.

ONLY one person here plays anything other than guitar.

He is an ex molester or future one, i can’t remember.

IF we had had a drug test in effect at the time we could have AVOIDED all this diseases and suffering. BUT it was a bilateral descision and one not made lightly.

At the time.